Picking or cutting

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Picking or cutting

Postby Mimine » Sat Oct 29, 2016 6:45 am

Since I can't gain access to any other forums or post a new topic, I'll just do it here.
I really need to share how I feel with somebody that will understand.
I'm a teen, but I feel like I've been living way longer. I'm tired and worn out. I can't seem to think while I'm writing this, so I apologize for any spelling mistakes or something that doesn't make sense.
I struggle with skin picking as you guys do, and I've been reading some topics before I decided to post something. I have to admit that I feel a little better after what I have read. Now I know that I'm not alone and I don't feel so weird or crazy anymore, as I did before.

In the start I picked my skin a lot with my fingers and nails, which led me to hide myself with hats, scarves or my hair. I didn't think much about it back then, because it wasn't so bad or so I thought.
December last year it only got worse. My skin got worse and so the picking got worse. Now to the weird part that I feel uncomfortable with. I found out that I should just cut my pimples away, so people would think I just had a scratch and not bad skin. For me that was a way better solution, than using my fingers to get them away, so I got blades to remove them with.
I have been doing that till now and it has only gotten so much worse. I look like I have been fighting with 10 cats. People at school also keep asking me what it is I have on my face, or if I got scratched by an animal, so now I don't feel like going to school anymore. It's so embarrassing for me to show my face to others now and I feel like shit every single day. I keep looking at my reflection in mirrors or my phone to seek out new pimples that I can cut away, so I don't have to worry about that one pimple anymore, because it's so terrible having one small pimple rather than a cut. I just don't know what to do. I really feel like giving up.

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