picking trance?

[gerg]

[lib24]

[Cherry Berry]

[splendid]

[justagirl]

[beautifulsomeday]

[Caterpillar]

[Drowning Ophelia]

[Visual Eyez]

Wow, the trance-state, one of the reasons why I figured I was truely alone with this problem. It is so strange, going from spot to spot for lengthy periods picking, not really feeling the physical pain. There have been times when I've even drooled while picking in trance. Usually if I start to drool it snaps me out of it (and so it should!). I know thinking negative thoughts is part of it, but to be so focused on my pores that I don't even swallow?! Anyhow, this site has already helped me immensely. I plan to start a journal soon, then hopefully I can be cured. It feels good to be able to be social with better skin (still terrible skin in someone else's eyes?) I am so grateful to have found a community like this one. Going to go wash my face now then exit the bathroom!

[justagirl]

[csp_angie]

I've been working on a documentary about skin picking with a couple of film makers (not sure if it'll come together or not), but while I sit in the bathroom with the video camera and pick I noticed that it's hard to talk. Most of us pick alone when we go into the trance-like states, but I noticed while trying to talk into the camera that my words become disjointed because my focus is on that relief/ false sense of accomplishment that makes us continue to pick.

[Nectarine]

[aedrys]

[raj]

[Lana]

[Makdessi]

Like many of you, I'm both relieved and a little surprised to hear I am not the only one who loses hours to a trance state in the bathroom. I think yes, it is a safe place, or a place to be alone for many of us. A place to be with ourselves and go deep inside.

I notice my eyes actually have to re-adjust to the light when my body starts to ache and I come back.

The one thing I was doing that was helping before I found this site was when I would lean forward to the mirror to "check" my skin, I would look myself in the eyes first and say "I love you." It helped, it actually stopped me a few times.

The thing I need to work on is the immense backlog of pent-up urges. I literally itch.

[neverenough]

[sskatx]

[HelpMeStopSkinPicking]

Again I end up crying while discovering something new on here. Like memories when I was little of my mum and dad fighting so violently I couldnt breathe from fear and anger and tears- and there being no escape, except places where there were locks- like the bathroom and my bedroom. Which is where I pick. I too go into a trance, I think my longest being about 2 hours, where I have imprints on my legs from the counter.
I relate to each and every one of you. Including the part about imagining stories, trying to force a positive ending to a situation where I once again ended up the victim. I think this is why its so hard for me to be strong at work, if someone doesnt respect me I feel violated beyond what a "normal" person would.

By the way, I recall my Mum used to go into these trances too- hers were worse I think because she could fall into it while in the room with family. Seems like a learned coping mechanism for trauma. How sad that we must hurt ourselves for relief. I thought I was doing better, and then remembered how I butchered my breasts earlier tonight to get the satisfaction of what comes out of the pores before I had to make a decision. I then realized how awful this must look to the new guy I am dating- THIS NEEDS TO STOP. I need more help than I thought possible.

[lonewolfrissy]

Yes!!!!! I'll end up spending an hour without realizing that I have until I get back to my husband. And then I feel guilty, like a scolded child, like I will get lectured...

I think I an a combination of things. It is stress relief (I have alone time, I don't have to think/feel/hear it) self esteem(it'S not okay, I can be at the same level) and probably a coping/defense mechanism.

Which is funny... I've learned about stress, healthy ways to manage it, how to help someone else (massage therapy), and yet, I have a hard time following through my lessons. I can't find me time in some way without feeling guilty or like I am pissing someone off (5 adults, one toddler in a 3bed home that's small) or it costing money I don't have, especially when something else is needed.

Right now, I just finished another episode and I don't want to even play with my husband because I don't like what I have done and I don't want to hear it. I couldn't even enjoy today with friends. All week, I have been getting to school late because my uncle'S car has an overheating issue. (I don't have a working vehicle, my dad works nights and not home when u have to leave. The city bus takes forever and I already don't get enough sleep). The fastest route (freeway) had two accidents minimum every day. Side streets, I can at least pull over to let the car cool off without fearing being involved in an accident myself. But I hit every red light possible. Twice , I have caught a train and overheated the car. I an scared of the car die on me because of the traffic or someone not paying attention. Yesterday was horrible because of the same reasons, one going to get away for a few hours, visit some friends. Now, I'm getting a new instructor Tuesday, after having two previous ones. (One quit and the other was a temp) To top off this weekend, my little girl isn't feeling well. I couldn't focus on anything else today because I was taking care of my beautiful little girl...and I'm ashamed of this obsession because she's starting to do the same thing because she sees mommy doing it. I'm a little okay because I have a chance and hope to prevent he r from carrying on with this because she's little and doesn't understand.

No, I haven't tried getting professional help. I don't want to have explain where I an going. I don't want to hear what isn't going to help me, or possibly some medication where the side effects are just bad if not worse.

[CCStopPicking!]

This is all very interesting!
I am 25yo and I have just finished med school. I have been picking my skin for the past 10 years, and pulling out my hair for about the same amount of time. I completely recognise myself in the 'trance' state. I can 'lose myself' in the bathroom for countless minutes, and my hair pulling has become a ritual when I'm studying. Noone around me understands this. They don't understand why I can't stop.
It's exacerbated by stress and sleep deprivation for sure (I don't think of my skin on vacation), but I still have that sense of 'cleansing' while emptying my pores: I'm just cleaning my pores!
There must be some underlying chemical/neuronal circuit underlying this compulsion, which is enhanced/encouraged each time we pick, making it easier and easier to lose control. That would be really interesting to study!!

[buttercup]

Hello all, just came across this board and had to comment some info here that found on this topic...

Check out #3 Breaking the Trance of Limitation with John Soriano

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/lif ... 49693?mt=2


More great info here...

http://joankaylor.com/online-learning/